A short pause, just to answer this question, "Are you sane enough to write a guideline for that??"
Ohh Yes, I am living a 100% sane life, and sometimes I feel I am too normal to be myself. Get up, prepare breakfast for the kid, feed him, get ready, go to office, come back home, take kid to park, come back, prepare tea, prepare dinner for the kid, feed him, have dinner with family, let the kid sleep, do leftover household chores, sleep....Can I be normal more than this?, I dont read newspaper, don't watch tv(except peeping some asianet serials from kitchen) and more importantly dont think too much...
No, I am not saying you should marry for this reasons, but you should marry because you have lived an adventurous life enough to get tired of it...
But its not true, I am 100% normal, still thoughts pop up unexpectedly,though rarely...in the moments when I am with myself, on the way to office, when the kid is sleeping and I am alone, I do think- Am I happy? and the answer is "Yes, I am, if happiness means the absence of sadness, then I am happy"
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Step 2: Finding Him
Finding him- the ultimate step...till now it was only preparations, but now you are jumping to the well. I said "jump" because, once you do it, its not easy to come out...So think again and if still you feel so, read further...
I dont have much to say about 'finding him' in a love marriage, because that happens naturally without any outside support...but if its an arranged marriage, you will get lot of external support;
1. Parents- the ultimate support
2. matrimonial sites- of great help
3. marriage brokers, friends, relatives etc- not of much help
4. YOU- the ultimate victim
When parents do the googling, they mainly look for Religion, Caste, Family Status, Guy's Salary, Home, education and the looks. If 70% is ok, they will send the horoscope for further processing. This is a standard, tested format. Many parents aquire new tech skills to get their daughters married, like my father learned to use the internet for finding right guy. Parents who cant do this, get blames from impatient daughters. If your parents are not upto your expectations, push them, motivate them as they did when your were ready for your board exams, this is their test of life...
Now marriage sites and you- take a paper, write your expectations- your imaginations, dreams, looks, age difference etc...now just open bharat matrimony.com, if its your first experience I am sure you ll be surprised- not just one, but hundreds of them, d guy of your dreams...take one hour every day for this search, finally its your life...
Now when you write your imaginations, please dnt forget to write your dream of future life- you want to live with him only, or in a family, in India or outside etc etc...Ultimately your own horoscope as perfect as possible
See you later
I dont have much to say about 'finding him' in a love marriage, because that happens naturally without any outside support...but if its an arranged marriage, you will get lot of external support;
1. Parents- the ultimate support
2. matrimonial sites- of great help
3. marriage brokers, friends, relatives etc- not of much help
4. YOU- the ultimate victim
When parents do the googling, they mainly look for Religion, Caste, Family Status, Guy's Salary, Home, education and the looks. If 70% is ok, they will send the horoscope for further processing. This is a standard, tested format. Many parents aquire new tech skills to get their daughters married, like my father learned to use the internet for finding right guy. Parents who cant do this, get blames from impatient daughters. If your parents are not upto your expectations, push them, motivate them as they did when your were ready for your board exams, this is their test of life...
Now marriage sites and you- take a paper, write your expectations- your imaginations, dreams, looks, age difference etc...now just open bharat matrimony.com, if its your first experience I am sure you ll be surprised- not just one, but hundreds of them, d guy of your dreams...take one hour every day for this search, finally its your life...
Now when you write your imaginations, please dnt forget to write your dream of future life- you want to live with him only, or in a family, in India or outside etc etc...Ultimately your own horoscope as perfect as possible
See you later
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Are you ready(Part II)
One of the most imp. question is "are you a marriageable material?"
"Everyone do it, why cant I" was my answer...but its not simple as that, to be tied around d neck, to be in a family, to settle, to sacrifice u need immense courage & mental preparation, so please answer this questions before taking that BIG step;
1. Are you ready to dispose off your favorite may be torn tees, jeans, earrings etc etc- (in one word your style as such) and ready to accept new style statements- may not look good to you, but look stunning in the eyes of others..specially aunts and other relatives
2. Are you ready to exchange your hobbies, be it roaming around, movies, books etc,for some other may be more exciting time pass (dont tale any double meaning- i just meant shopping, visiting relatives etc..;)
3. Ready to change your wake up, sleeping and snap timings?
4. Ready to forget the entire feminist lessons you strongly believe, and ready to be a female?
5. Ready to even think about what others want from you rather than what you want from you (d most difficult part!)
If the answer is yes, go on...
"Everyone do it, why cant I" was my answer...but its not simple as that, to be tied around d neck, to be in a family, to settle, to sacrifice u need immense courage & mental preparation, so please answer this questions before taking that BIG step;
1. Are you ready to dispose off your favorite may be torn tees, jeans, earrings etc etc- (in one word your style as such) and ready to accept new style statements- may not look good to you, but look stunning in the eyes of others..specially aunts and other relatives
2. Are you ready to exchange your hobbies, be it roaming around, movies, books etc,for some other may be more exciting time pass (dont tale any double meaning- i just meant shopping, visiting relatives etc..;)
3. Ready to change your wake up, sleeping and snap timings?
4. Ready to forget the entire feminist lessons you strongly believe, and ready to be a female?
5. Ready to even think about what others want from you rather than what you want from you (d most difficult part!)
If the answer is yes, go on...
Step 1: Are you ready?
Are you ready to marry? To answer this, I need to think why I got married;
1. I turned 26
2. Most of my friends and batch-mates got married
3. My parents are getting older day by day and wanted to relive from the tension
4. Gold prices are soaring
And, now after three years I am forced to rethink why I got married...
Age:- If age is the reason you want to marry, I recommend you marry at 21. At 21 you need a guy. At 21 you feel u cant live without him,he is the only reason for your existence. Once you cross 21, its another world, you r gonna taste freedom which will make you mad (nd bad too)...
Friends got married:- Facebook is raining with pictures of your batchmate's wedding, their honeymoon, kids and sunny pictures of "happily living ever after". I believe this is a true inspiration, but keep control
Parental pressure:- This is something u cant ignore. My mother just said she will go for a pilgrimage, if I don't get married at 26. But u can't blame them, a daughter is like a fuming volcano. She needs to be in the "safe" hands of a partner before its too late...
Gold Prices:- Some thing you cant control
But when I think about it, I feel I got married not because of any of these reasons; but because I can be with someone i can grow old with,because its better to be together and quarrel often than to weep alone in rain, because there are certain moments in your life which you desperately want to share...
1. I turned 26
2. Most of my friends and batch-mates got married
3. My parents are getting older day by day and wanted to relive from the tension
4. Gold prices are soaring
And, now after three years I am forced to rethink why I got married...
Age:- If age is the reason you want to marry, I recommend you marry at 21. At 21 you need a guy. At 21 you feel u cant live without him,he is the only reason for your existence. Once you cross 21, its another world, you r gonna taste freedom which will make you mad (nd bad too)...
Friends got married:- Facebook is raining with pictures of your batchmate's wedding, their honeymoon, kids and sunny pictures of "happily living ever after". I believe this is a true inspiration, but keep control
Parental pressure:- This is something u cant ignore. My mother just said she will go for a pilgrimage, if I don't get married at 26. But u can't blame them, a daughter is like a fuming volcano. She needs to be in the "safe" hands of a partner before its too late...
Gold Prices:- Some thing you cant control
But when I think about it, I feel I got married not because of any of these reasons; but because I can be with someone i can grow old with,because its better to be together and quarrel often than to weep alone in rain, because there are certain moments in your life which you desperately want to share...
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
About the blog
Hey,
Thought of sharing some secrets with you guys... from the experience of a decade (19-29 years of life) incl. three long years of marriage... Please note, this is valid only for my gal friends, cousins and (few guys too) married or not, here is a pinch of salt n pepper...
Views expressed in this blog are only from my experience, I am sure there might be luckier and not-so-lucky partners.At this moment, you are free to quit if you think its not worth reading further .
As of now, I am thinking of following chapters, liable to change:-
1. Are you ready?
2. Finding him
3. Wedding
4. The wife life
5. The d.i.l life
6. Coping strategies
7. The mother life
I have to confess here that, I have to be diplomatic, neutral and general in many points considering the chances of any near and dear ones reading this blog. However I will try to be true my heart as far as possible.
Looking forward
Love
Thought of sharing some secrets with you guys... from the experience of a decade (19-29 years of life) incl. three long years of marriage... Please note, this is valid only for my gal friends, cousins and (few guys too) married or not, here is a pinch of salt n pepper...
Views expressed in this blog are only from my experience, I am sure there might be luckier and not-so-lucky partners.At this moment, you are free to quit if you think its not worth reading further .
As of now, I am thinking of following chapters, liable to change:-
1. Are you ready?
2. Finding him
3. Wedding
4. The wife life
5. The d.i.l life
6. Coping strategies
7. The mother life
I have to confess here that, I have to be diplomatic, neutral and general in many points considering the chances of any near and dear ones reading this blog. However I will try to be true my heart as far as possible.
Looking forward
Love
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